And once again, I’m torn apart.

April 26, 2011

This goes out for that one special person closest to my heart, Marty. 

Baby, I know for the past week we’ve been having problems. Fights, shouts, foul words, unpleasant actions, and the like. I’m so sorry for everything I’ve done wrong. I’m the one to blame for all those things that made our relationship changed for the worst. I really feel bad for what’s happening, but I’m still hoping that things will be the way as it was before. I’m still wishing that someday, that Marty – sweet, caring, thoughtful, loving, will come back as soon as possible. I can’t afford to let this come to an end. I’ve been spending several days crying my heart out because of this mess, but all I can do is to prove to you that I’m willing to change for the better. I thought everything’s gonna be okay because we were already able to talk about our relationship yesterday, your treatment towards me was coming back to normal (sweet, malambing), yet how come this has to end too soon? You’re beginning to be cold again and it kills me little by little. Maybe I just expected too much that it lead me to disappointments. I know people change and things happen, but I remember how it was back then. I just don’t want to suffer anymore, please. I beg you. We can return to what we’ve become before without you being cold to me, right? I just can’t take this anymore. One thing’s for sure: I’ll be waiting for you to come back whatever happens. I’m always here for you, may it be through good or bad times. You can always count on me. Whatever happens, I’ll be there. I’m not asking for too much, just stick around. Hold on, because in the end, everything’s gonna be worth it. I love you so much. I can’t just let this fade away. I miss the old you and I miss everything we had before. Good times, as we said. I’m still hoping that my efforts and my sacrifices will pay off. I just want you back, us back. I’ve never been like this before and I’m so scared that one day, this will come to an end. That one day, you’ll gonna find someone who can satisfy you and give everything to you. Without you, life will be miserable at its best. Hugs and kisses. :* >:D<

Maybe it’s not always about trying to fix something broken, maybe it’s about starting over and creating something better.

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